Jim Daly: On St. Patrick’s Day, in praise of the imperfect Irish family

on Mar17
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Given my heritage from the Emerald Isle, you’ll have to forgive my bias, but there’s something about the Irish – and especially on Saint Patrick’s Day. It’s kind of a family thing for me.

For most, Saint Patrick is something of a mythical figure – a name on a grand New York City Catholic cathedral or on a small sign outside a suburban parish. But Patrick was a real man – a fifth-century British missionary who used creative methods to convert the men and women of Ireland to Christianity. 

But it’s Patrick’s rise and accomplishments amid persecution and hardship that especially intrigues me. Although I wasn’t kidnapped at 16 and sold into slavery like him, my early life was a mess, too.

It all fell apart for me when I was just five years of age. I was the youngest of five kids – a surprise baby born to older parents. I certainly didn’t feel like I had the “luck of the Irish.”

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My father was an alcoholic. He walked out on us when I was five and divorced my mother. Even then, I knew he had a sickness. I loved him, but he regularly let me down. 

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Witty and resourceful with a gift for the gab, my Irish mother did what she could to hold us together.  But then she died of cancer when I was nine. My stepfather left the day of her funeral, leaving me all alone. 

It was W.B. Yeats, the Ireland-born poet, who once wrote in sarcastic and fatalistic terms, “Being Irish, he had an abiding sense of tragedy, which sustained him through temporary periods of joy.” 

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The Irish don’t have a corner on catastrophe, of course. But one of the reasons we tend to weather it relatively well, I think, is because we’re sustained by our families.

Following my mother’s death, I landed in California’s foster care system and with a family whose father was struggling emotionally. He accused me of trying to throw him off a cliff – even though we lived at the bottom of a valley. 

Thankfully, my siblings stepped up, with one of my brothers inviting me to live with him. Five decades later all of the Daly siblings remain close – a testament to the firm foundation my mother laid before God called her home. 

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Saint Patrick understood that the best way to convince someone of something better wasn’t by demonizing a current belief, but to take some of those traditions and adapt them. Maybe it was because he knew how to make the best of difficult situations. For example, the patron saint of Ireland capitalized on the Irish penchant to worship gods with fire and encouraged them to use bonfires to celebrate Christ’s resurrection at Easter. 

Knowing that the sun was a popular Irish symbol, he superimposed it on the Christian cross, making it all the more attractive to hang in homes. That version is what’s become known as the “Celtic Cross” today.  

After six years in slavery, Saint Patrick escaped, regrouped and eventually returned to Ireland where he began his legendary missionary career. In just a few short years, he went from his world almost ending to changing the world one person at a time.

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The English-born bishop whom we celebrate today is a reminder that good things can come from horribly difficult times and challenges. 

And whether you’re Irish or not, from a family that’s thriving or one that’s struggling to stay afloat, that’s a truth we all desperately need to cling to this Saint Patrick’s Day. 

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