This is a rush transcript from “The Five,” June 2, 2021. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

GREG GUTFELD, FOX NEWS HOST:  Hi. I’m Greg Gutfeld along with Dagen McDowell, Harold Ford, Jr., Jesse Watters, and Sandra Smith. It’s THE FIVE. 

There seems to be no end in sight to the crisis at the southern border. 

Another disturbing video shows a small child being abandoned. This time it’s five-year-old boy seen pleading with smugglers not to leave him after being dumped just steps from the Texas border. 

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNKNOWN:  No! No! No!

(END VIDEO CLIP) 

GUTFELD (on camera): Texas is responding to the crisis by declaring a disaster at our southern border. Governor Greg Abbott says Biden’s policies are emboldening drug cartels and human traffickers. But the president doesn’t seem to be listening. The White House just officially ended the remain in Mexico policy that the last administration put in place. 

So, Jesse, I’m asking a question perfectly tailored for you. Why do Democrats hate migrant children? 

JESSE WATTERS, FOX NEWS HOST:  How long do we have, Greg? You know who shot the video? The French press. 

GUTFELD:  Really?

WATTERS:  So, again, that’s foreigners doing the jobs that Americans won’t do. I think there’s more to the story than we were here, because they’re saying yes, the little kid is going to meet up with her parents who already crossed. Why wouldn’t the parents just bring the kid across intact? Because Biden is letting family units come and then he’s getting them bus tickets to Tennessee. That doesn’t make sense. 

This I think was the French press intercepting a child sex trafficking drop off, that’s my impression. A good thing, Greg, that Kamala Harris is going to address the root causes. She doesn’t realize you can address root causes and the crisis at the same time. 

So, you get lung cancer. You could wait five years and get a class action lawsuit together and sue big tobacco or you could stop smoking and do chemo. You could do both at the same time. Biden and Harris don’t understand you can do both. Now she’s going to go down to Guatemala and she’s going to address root causes. One of them she says is food insecurity. 

Have you seen any of these migrants crossing, Greg? They do not look like emaciated to me. She also says that one of the drivers of this migration is climate. I looked at the weather in Guatemala City, it is 76 degrees. You know what the weather is in El Paso, Texas? 82. It’s hotter here than it is down there. 

So, they want to talk about root causes, the root causes in the White House, not the northern triangle because when you get rid of the remain in Mexico, you get rid of the wall and you bring back catch and release, that’s what explodes migrations. 

I think honestly, Biden has anger issues. I think he’s taking out his anger on the red states, he’s flooding Texas with these illegals and these drugs and these gang members, he’s canceling energy projects in Oklahoma and Alaska, he’s boycotting Georgia, he’s shipping illegals to Tennessee.

I mean, Donald Trump loved blue states. He was constantly rescuing factories from Michigan and sending ventilators to New York and even saved the dairy farmers with tariffs in Vermont. Vermont! 

GUTFELD:  Yes.

WATTERS:  A state that will never vote for Donald Trump. So, I mean, Joe Biden, can he lift a finger for Texas? Lift a finger, Joe. 

GUTFELD:  You know, Harold, you just experience your first, I would call that, fruit bouquet, you know, when you get a free, it was all these different parts such as he creates that Jesse creates and you don’t know which one you are supposed to attack first. That’s — that’s his genius. 

But I —

(CROSSTALK) 

WATTERS: Overwhelming force. 

GUTFELD: Overwhelming. There’s like six things you can respond to, Harold, if you wish. 

HAROLD FORD, JR., FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR:  Look, I’d say a couple of things. 

She’s going to go down and she’s going to address one part of it. 

SANDRA SMITH, FOX NEWS HOST:  To Guatemala. 

FORD:  To Guatemala. Right. So, the last time there was a serious investment, I’ll come and try which part of the trio want to go after but try to react to it, but the last time we got serious about trying to stabilize our hemisphere in this regard it was under President Kennedy. He passed the Alliance for Progress, a very targeted relief package. 

Now, drugs have been coming across the border, even when President Trump was there, we had a serious challenge and I wouldn’t believe President Trump’s border policy for that. Democrats have to get serious, more serious about what happens with people coming across the border and we have to put more people down there to protect our border. And if that means having a debate about who was watching kids and who is not watching kids, perhaps we should have that and compartmentalize that. 

You think about what we spend in the Middle East to stabilize it, we spend billions a year, we spend pennies on the dollar to stabilize our own hemisphere. I don’t want to keep having this political argument. And we can go back and forth, Democrats gain a little bit from it every two years, Republican sometimes gain from it. 

When I was in Congress George W. Bush was trying to advance in some to stabilize down there and he talked about an immigration plan. In fact, the last comprehensive immigration plan, you know put it forward? President Reagan. Then you name me as CEO of a company that can take 40 years to say we are going to revisit a very controversial serious problem we have within a company and I’ll show you a CEO who doesn’t work there any longer. 

We allow our presidents and our Congress year after year after year after to allow this silly conversation, not that anything you said was silly but it’s silly that we have the conversation repeatedly, that is a recurring one. We should be able to do both, address tobacco companies and address the cancer, to borrow, I think that was part of the treat, the treat as well, so it’s hard to follow. 

(CROSSTALK)

WATTERS:  Yes, you go.

FORD:  We’ve got to figure out how we do that.

GUTFELD:  You know, Sandra, to Harold’s point, it does — this is a cynical take from me which is a surprise. When the Democrats are not in power — not in power, immigration is their cudgel. And then when the Republicans are not in power it’s theirs. So, it’s a game in which every four years the teams just switch sides. That’s all they do. They switch sides and it becomes an outrage for one side and then the other side has to defend themselves. And this never changes. 

SMITH:  And then watching the White House press briefing today, Jen Psaki is barely even asked about this. This video of this five-year-old boy up for the White House to respond to. I mean, he’s five years old, carrying a teddy bear. His words, don’t leave me, where are you going, no, no, no, don’t leave. 

The woman who left him there, to your point, Jesse, spoke to the Associated foreign press. She says the parents are already here, the boy is coming in from Mexico. A reminder that Kamala Harris, by the way, there’s reports today that she apparently panicked after Joe Biden gave her this immigration assignment might give us a clue why she hasn’t visited the border, hasn’t held a press conference about this. 

There is a declaration by the Texas governor about what’s happening there, resources are running dry, these towns are seeing crime on the rise. And a little boy like that, why is that not being addressed and why is the messaging from this White House not changing? When Jen Psaki was asked about this in the press briefing room today, she said migrating to the border, this is our message, puts you and others at risk.

There is no message that they are putting out there that our borders are closed and there’s a right way to enter the country. Why? Why does Kamala Harris not attack the situation and why is her own party not holding her up to the responsibility? 

GUTFELD:  She’s learning to hide. It worked for Joe. Right? So she’s just out of — out of sight, out of mind. Dagen, I have a theory, would you like to hear it? 

DAGEN MCDOWELL, FOX NEWS BUSINESS CORRESPONDENT:  Of course. 

GUTFELD:  All right. I think that many offenders of the status quo are guilty of distance privilege. They are far enough away from the problem for it not to matter so you have this declaration of disaster. Those are the people like that and then everybody else, it’s not a big deal, it’s not a big deal, it’s because you are not there. We can actually in New York City, we can reap the benefits of the cheap labor at our restaurants. But we never have to deal with the problems down there. 

MCDOWELL:  Well, the chattering classes and the elite here in New York and in Los Angeles and Washington, D.C., they look at Texas and go, those, you know, stupid red necks groups. They don’t really care what happens in red states, to Jesse’s point. I just want to know how many screaming kids is a going to take for Biden co —

SMITH:  Amen.

MCDOWELL:  — to give a damn —

SMITH:  Amen.

MCDOWELL:  — because all they’re concerned about is the words and the messaging, right? Just a few months ago we’re arguing over, it’s not a crisis or chaos, it’s a challenge. They can’t wordsmith crying children. 

Well, they can’t word this myth, crying children. They can’t massage the message of a five-year-old screaming to make it palatable to the compliant media or their base. 

What Biden and company have done is they broke intentionally something that was fixed to bringing people across the border who are potentially future voters and at the same time they have simultaneously created an opportunity for people, for human traffickers and drug traffickers to profit off of human suffering and tragedy. 

So, if you look at the children being terrorized at the border, but this is in Biden’s world this is just the political price to pay for their policy. 

This is just collateral damage. The person who dumped that kid or the people who dumped that kid at the border, they don’t care about his well- being just like the people in the White House. 

GUTFELD:  Yes, but that child still will always have connections to whoever they hired and that’s going to be used against that kid when he’s in the United States, whenever they want anything because they know the kid has relatives there. They need him to work — do some work, some work, you know, drug work, whatever, he’s got to do it or somebody is going to get hurt. 

All right. Ahead, Dr. Fauci getting ready to cash in on the pandemic with a brand-new book. Hooray. 

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

SMITH (on camera): Dr. Anthony Fauci causing more controversy as he is being accused of profiting off the pandemic by putting out a new book that was written during the health crisis. A newly released e-mails now show that between Fauci and a researcher tied to the Wuhan lab, they reveal that Fauci may have given China free pass early on. That research writing this. 

I just wanted to say a personal thank you on behalf of our staff and collaborators for publicly standing up and stating that the scientific evidence supports a natural origin for COVID-19 from a bat to human spill over, not a lab release from the Wuhan Institute of Virology. 

I don’t know, Greg. My first question is why would Dr. Fauci have been communicating directly with a researcher from the Wuhan lab and did he take that researcher at his word? 

GUTFELD:  I supposed that, and I think that researcher, fact-check me on this, somebody over there. 

WATTERS:  Who are you talking to? 

GUTFELD:  Just anybody. But this dude was really involved in this stuff —

SMITH:  Aha.

GUTFELD:  — and he was on the board of like fact-checking on Facebook —

SMITH:  Yes.

GUTFELD:  — so he was like, he was — he had his finger in everything. By the way, the book title is — Fauci’s book title is “Expect the Unexpected: 

10 Lessons in Truth, Service, and the Way Forward.” That was his second choice because how I saved the world was taken. 

What I really noticed in the e-mails was, there was so many kiss-ass —

SMITH:  Yes.

GUTFELD:  — e-mails by people in the media and other industries trying to ingratiate themselves to pope Fauci. And it was so — there was so much fawning that I think I got a deer tick just reading them. But I think — I

— there’s — he’s all over the place. He’s very careful to — he’s very cagey because he knows that his e-mails are going to be read. But this is –

– this is kind of scary because basically they are massaging this idea away, they are trying to make it go away. 

SMITH:  To Greg’s point about the praise, Jesse.

WATTERS:  Yes.

SMITH:  That particular e-mail went on this day, from my perspective, your comments are brave, that researcher said to Fauci. And coming from your trusted voice will help dispel the myth being spun around the virus’ 

origins. 

WATTERS:  Fauci is about to get the Avenatti treatment.

GUTFELD:  You think so?

WATTERS:  You know, when they love you one minute and the next minute they are like, who are you? Because he’s no longer going to be useful. This is a long list of dirty laundry from Fauci. There’s e-mails in there of scientist saying, yes, this virus looks like it’s engineered, you might want to look into it. One scientist e-mailed, hey, this is how they engineered it.

SMITH:  Yes.

WATTERS:  Fauci is in there sending e-mails, you know, mask don’t really work. And then he’s out there on TV saying people need to double mask. This is bad stuff and I think Biden is going to soon look to get Dr. Anthony Fauci a little bit of an off-ramp because next Senate hearing I see Rand Paul licking his chops, he’s going to tear the doctor a new one and it’s not going to be pretty. 

SMITH:  Harold, Jesse is referencing the one expert who warned Fauci in January 2020, that the coronavirus potentially looked engineered and had some unusual features. So, to Greg’s point about this book that Fauci is writing about the truth, will he reveal that he was given a heads-up to look into that at the very least? 

FORD:  We’ll see. Look, I think if you pull back the covers on e-mails and a lot of things, I think you’ll find a lot of back-and-forth between people in government. It’s hard for me to reach a conclusion to Dr. Fauci has anything other than may be politically naive. To call him intentionally malicious or un-American from a guy who’s given his entire public life from AIDS to COVID, 40 years. 

Has he made some mistakes? Sure. I think when President Trump, I think maybe naively suggested that maybe we can inject ourselves with soap and that might serve as a defense to COVID. And he asked Dr. Birx that —

(CROSSTALK) 

GUTFELD:  Did he say that, Harold?

FORD:  Well, no. He asked Dr. Birx a question.

GUTFELD:  No, it was about light. It was about infrared light. 

FORD:  But he also asked about well, whatever it was, I thought it was an interesting question. And she answered the question —

(CROSSTALK)

WATTERS:  But one fact-check that. It’s fact-check than you.

FORD:  Do I have one of those. So all I’m saying is, I think that, I think we have to– we have to be willing to move beyond that and if we find that there is an effort by Dr. Fauci to have covered up the fact that this came from this lab and we are now going to investigate it, then I think the dagger should be out. 

But it’s just hard for me to reach a conclusion. That, I mean, I don’t think President Reagan wanted anything but freedom for our country even though the Iran-Contra thing happened on his watch. People make mistakes, they say things and they move on. This is not even close to Iran-Contra, but we’ll learn from this book and we’ll learn more if we allow an investigation. I hope my party and I hope Republicans allow for an investigation to take place in Congress so we can get to the bottom of whether this came from this lab or not. 

WATTERS:  Yes, but how many people died in Iran-Contra compared to a pandemic?

FORD:  Well, —

(CROSSTALK)

WATTERS:  A lot more people died during this pandemic than Iran-Contra. 

FORD:  Right. But you’re not blaming Dr. Fauci for that, Jesse? 

WATTERS:  If it looks like he was covering up for China. No. If you can point back to that money that went to Wuhan to do gain-of-function and him trying to cover that up after 3.6 million have died so they can keep the heat on Trump instead of China, and then lock every American down so the Democrats can rewrite all these state election laws to beat Trump? No. 

That’s a pretty big scandal. 

FORD:  I accept that. But are you — I want to make sure I understand what you’re saying. You’re saying if we had determined at the beginning that this came from the lab as opposed to — 

(CROSSTALK)

WATTERS:  Yes. Because that would’ve united the country against China instead of divided the country against Trump. 

SMITH:  All right. Let me get Dagen in here. Because Harold is making the point about public service Dr. Fauci, 40 plus years. But he’s writing a book and he’s profiting off of that book, a book that he chose to write during the pandemic while this health crisis was still happening, Dagen. 

GUTFELD:  Imagine writing a book during a pandemic. 

WATTERS:  I mean, who has the time? 

MCDOWELL:  Yes, at least he waited a little bit longer than killer Cuomo here in New York. He’s a spotlight seeking hack and we’ve seen that repeatedly over and over again. He changes story still gets booked on CNN. 

Listen, the last two books I read were about Ted Bundy and Diane Downs who tried to murder her three kids, killing one of them. 

So, you know, reading Fauci’s book isn’t out of the question for me. The issue is money, it is always following the money. And Fauci’s National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases funneled money through that researcher, Peter Daszak —

SMITH:  Yes.

MCDOWELL:  — EcoHealth alliance into the Wuhan lab and Fauci says definitively, well, it didn’t go to gain-of-function research, potentially make the coronavirus more transmissible and more deadly. He does not know that. There is no way for him to ever know that. 

But what I do know is that money from the United States could’ve gone to potentially create a virus that has come back and killed 600,000 Americans and three and a half million people worldwide. I kind of think that is worth looking into.

SMITH:  Yes.

MCDOWELL:  And by the way, Tony Fauci, he’s past his expiration date but he’s not naive. So, if an explosion happened in a town that has a munitions factory —

WATTERS:  Yes.

MCDOWELL:  — you don’t go look in the laundromat. You go look in the munitions factory. 

SMITH:  The Daily Caller had a tweet out today, sick of him yet? It was every cover of every magazine Dr. Fauci has grace during this crisis. One sitting by of course we know.

First it was a pipeline. Now hackers are targeting our food supply. So, what is the White House going to do about this? That’s next. 

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

FORD (on camera): Well hackers are at it again. This time targeting what we eat, though. The world’s largest meat supplier JBS is slowly coming back online, that’s after a massive cyber-attack force it to shut down beef processing plants all across America. The FBI says Russian-linked hackers are responsible. And here is how our president is reacting.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP) 

UNKNOWN:  Mr. President, will we retaliate against Russia for this latest ransomware attack? 

JOE BIDEN, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA:  We’re looking closely at that issue.

UNKNOWN:  Do you think Putin is testing you? 

BIDEN:  No.

(CROSSTALK)

UNKNOWN:  Mr. President, can you —

(END VIDEO CLIP) 

FORD (on camera): Greg, I’m going to call you by your name this time. 

Should there be, we saw the Colonial Pipeline, here were are today, should there be an effort between the government and the private sector, should there be, the libertarians and the Congress who oppose this or some liberal Democrats who oppose this, should there be a concerted effort to try to go after this to help them build up their cyber defenses? 

GUTFELD: Absolutely. I mean, this is — this the new war, I mean, between drones and bioterror viruses and attacking our grid, this is how it’s going to be. Nobody is going to be throwing bodies at us anymore and we’re not going to be bombing. It’s all going to be this. 

I’m just amazed, I mean, it’s like, we have seen, OK, they can hack our meat supply, right, they can hack our pipeline, they can hack the Department of Defense back in 1999, they hack Equifax. They can hack PlayStation but under no circumstance it’s impossible to hack an election, that’s a fact. 

By the way, what concerns me is how the administration is still saying that climate change is the national security threat. No, no, no, no. This is. 

This is. You know, climate change doesn’t have a moral intention, right? 

It’s not trying to destroy you so you have time to figure it out and we have smart people working with climate change. But there are these priorities that I just mentioned, these are people intent on destroying us, whether it is bioterror or, you know, going after our meat and our gas, what’s next? Our breweries? Seriously, this is our American — this is our stuff. 

FORD:  Obviously, the president is planning down to sit down, Jesse, with –

–

WATTERS:  Yes.

FORD:  — President Putin here in the coming days. Should this be a reason to not hold the summit? I want to hear Sandra and Dagen’s take on this as well. 

WATTERS:  Harold, I’m with Greg. When they hacked Podesta’s e-mail, well, don’t fall for a phishing scam. When they hacked the pipeline, shots fired. 

When they hacked our beef —

GUTFELD:  Yes, it’s over.

WATTERS:  — tactical nuclear strike. I mean, there are a few sacred things in this country, Harold. There is football season, there is Christmas season, and then there is grilling season. And we are right on the cusp of grilling season. And men like to grill because we don’t have to do it in the kitchen. And we can make whatever we want. And we don’t want fish, and we don’t want chicken, we want steaks and burgers. And if they interfere with that, I’m going to hold Vlad personally responsible. 

And this is how you do it. You remember the Bush Doctrine. If there is a terrorist that you’re harboring in your country, we hold that government accountable. So, if they’re doing this from Russia, I’m holding the Kremlin responsible, and then we’re going to go after them inside Russia. 

Also what you need to do, you need to have Congress pass a law tomorrow, never going to happen, but they should do it immediately, and they should prohibit companies from paying ransomware cyber thieves. They should prohibit them because that de-incentivizes the hackers. Also, all the infrastructure money that Biden wants to spend on windmills, take it from the windmills and give it to the critical companies that are going to get hacked. 

Give it to big beef, give it to utilities, give it to the pipelines, so they can hire some white hat hackers so they can probe and find our soft spots and upgrade their cyber defenses. 

GUTFELD: Big beef.

WATTERS: Big beef.

SMITH: Wait till they find a way into our banking systems. Obviously, they already have, Dagen. Wait till they find their way into our financial infrastructure, our equities markets, our commodities markets. This is obviously already hit. 

I mean, based on this FBI report that they’re now confirming that this was this Russian group REvil. There’s a lot more information about this group, the public face of it, Bloomberg reporting, is a user on the dark web cybercrime form XSS who goes by the name Unknown, exclusively publishes in Russian. 

So, if you think that the Colonial Pipeline and now this hack of our beef processing plants here in the United States and globally, if you think this is the end of it, it is not. 

GUTFELD: You know, my wife has been away for a while. 

SMITH: We are extremely vulnerable in all sectors of our economy. We are extremely vulnerable. When Biden sits down with Putin, there better be tough talk, if he sits down with him.

FORD JR.: So, you think — yes or no, the summit should still happen? 

SMITH: Yes, if he can be tough.

FORD JR.: Dagen, yes or no, you think he can be tough? And your — 

MCDOWELL: Oh, hell no and hell now. Of course, he should meet with Putin. 

It’s a present and a gift to him. The Biden administration think that talking makes us safer. Well, I would say bending down to a tyrant, groveling before a dictator, an evil dictator who murders people is — makes us look weaker. 

And to Greg’s point, you talked about climate, gasoline, and beef eaters are meat eaters, the two greatest enemies of the climate change activists. 

Could it be climate terrorism? I’m just asking the question.

FORD JR.: We’re going — do you think he should hold a summit? Should he meet with Putin? 

GUTFELD: Yes, I got to disagree. I think — I think he’s like — if he holds firm, you know, there’s going to be something we can get out of this. 

There’s going to be something. If Putin decides to have them killed, that’s something, you know. It’s possible. 

FORD JR.: “THE FASTEST” is up next.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

WATTERS: Welcome back Dillon fans. Time for “THE FASTEST.” First up, blame your grandparents the next time you freak out on someone who cuts you off. 

It turns out your road rage is actually genetic. And researchers have a new term for it called Accelarousal which is stress provoked by acceleration events. 

Say, accelarousal, you’ll enjoy it. 

SMITH: I can tell you do, Jesse. This study has concluded that drivers who showed signs of stress were much more exhausted after finishing with these events than others. I will tell you the one thing that gets me on the road is when there’s an exit coming up, it says half mile up the road, and everybody waits their turn to make the exit and then all these people come around and then they duck in at the last second, slows down traffic. That is the one thing.

WATTERS: Greg doesn’t have road rage. He just says rage.

GUTFELD: I have– it’s true. It’s all the time, non-stop. I suffer from premature accelarousal. 

WATTERS: We can prescribe something for that. 

GUTFELD: Yes, yes, but the side effects includes so many things. To your — you know what you’re talking about? You know what’s genetic? You hit it. 

The revulsion regarding line-cutting. 

SMITH: It’s not there.

GUTFELD: No matter where — no matter where you are in life, when somebody gets in front of you, it triggers. And that’s the only thing that causes road rage in a car — 

WATTERS: That’s why I’m a border hawk because I don’t want people cutting in line. Right, Dagen?

MCDOWELL: Yes, I’m a — I have grocery store rage for that very reason, line-cutting. But I don’t get — my road rage manifests itself through lots of unusual hand gestures that I created. But I never ever get aggressive with my car because I don’t want scratches. Like, I care more about the car than I do about the jerk. 

WATTERS: You never see any road rage in Tennessee, do you?

FORD JR.: Ever.

WATTERS: Ever. 

FORD JR.: Look, whether it’s genetic or not, whoever figures out a solution to this deserves a Nobel Prize. 

WATTERS: OK.

FORD JR.: I mean, for all the reasons you said. And I want to make sure I know when you’re on the road.

WATTERS: All right, next up, talk about money for nothing. An Italian sculptor just sold an invisible statue that doesn’t actually exist for more than $18,000. Instead, the lucky recipient will get a certificate of authentification that is both signed and stamped by the artist. 

Greg, I think this is brilliant. I should have gotten my wife like an invisible diamond ring. 

GUTFELD: Yes. 

WATTERS: And just said, you know what, it’s very expensive.

GUTFELD: By the way, just so you know, because I talked to the sculptor. I actually brought it here. I actually have it. 

WATTERS: It’s –oh — 

GUTFELD: Oh, my God, I dropped it. 

WATTERS: You don’t have $18,000.

GUTFELD: I don’t but I got insurance.

WATTERS: Oh, thank goodness. 

GUTFELD: I just broke the damn thing. 

WATTERS: You insure it for more than it’s worth. 

GUTFELD: It’s a mess. 

WATTERS: Sandra, are you buying this? 

SMITH: No, no. I mean, they’re describing this as a vacuum. Nothing more than space full of energy. How does her energy from a blank space? I don’t know. $18,000, you get a certificate, and you bring it home? I still don’t get it.

WATTERS: When you did a hit for “SPECIAL REPORT” were you’re standing behind that invisible sculpture or is that an oil painting.

FORD JR.: They should drug test people who bought — who buy these kinds of things. 

WATTERS: That’s true. 

FORD JR.: And when you buy your wife that second ring, I’d like you to pick me up one.

WATTERS: I’ll get you one. On the house, Harold. What about you, Dagen?

MCDOWELL: I majored in art history. So, if I worked on another network like CNN, I would say that it’s brilliant. But I work here and it’s cut her up.

WATTERS: All right.

MCDOWELL: But I would like a GIF of Greg doing that.

WATTERS: Yes. We’ll have Johnny fire that up. And finally, flying is already bad enough. This new seating design is sure to make things worse. 

This concept aims to turn the airplane cabin into something like a double- decker bus squeezing in as many passengers as possible.

I don’t know. Dagen, do you think this is actually more efficient?

MCDOWELL: I don’t care if it is. I am not sitting with my face on somebody’s backside ever. Well, maybe, but not on a plane. 

WATTERS: Harold, are you — are you paying for the top shelf or are you going bottom?

FORD JR.: I go with what I said before. Whoever figures out an answer to this — to this deserves a Nobel Prize as well. This is crazier than the other thing. 

WATTERS: I don’t know. The airlines always find a way to make some money. 

SMITH: If anybody hears from the Chicago area, you know that you’ve got the double-decker trains there and people are used to this. People are willing to do this. I think like you’ve got the Spirit Airlines, the Southwest Airlines, they would figure it out and they would sell every seat.

WATTERS: Greg?

GUTFELD: I told you about my innovation, right? It’s called door-to-door snore. Did we talk about this? 

WATTERS: No. 

GUTFELD: This is where they come to your house, right? And they put you under. And the next moment you wake up, in your hotel destination. 

WATTERS: I like that idea. 

GUTFELD: Yes. So, it’s — you’re unconscious the whole time. They can literally stack you like things in a plane — I had a morbid thought there. 

They could stack you like loaves of bread and they could pack you.

WATTERS: You stole that from the A-Team. 

GUTFELD: No, I didn’t. 

WATTERS: Didn’t they used to drug the guy that was afraid of flying and then he wake up, and then — 

FORD JR.: His name is Mr. T.

WATTERS: Yes. 

GUTFELD: You know what, it seeped into my brain. I get all my ideas from the A-Team. 

WATTERS: That explains “GUTFELD!”

FORD JR.: You combined the last story and this story, invisible people you sit to. 

WATTERS: Invisible people. All right, up next, not invisible, Trey Gowdy seen by everybody on his new weekend primetime show. He’s next.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

MCDOWELL: Sunday nights just got better. Trey Gowdy’s brand new shows “SUNDAY NIGHT IN AMERICA” will debut this weekend at 7:00 p.m. Eastern time. The man himself is here to give us a preview. And we have called some of our sources and we’ve done a deep dive on your background, Trey, so this will be a whole lot of fun. 

But first, what’s your goal for the show every week, Trey?

TREY GOWDY, FOX NEWS CHANNEL CONTRIBUTOR: Well, Dagen, thanks for having me. And let me just get this out of the way upfront. I was just shocked as the five of you all are that I have a show on Fox. So, I mean, no one act like anyone expected it. I’m surprised and you’re surprised. 

Sunday nights to me is the perfect night to kind of reflect and remember the week that’s gone by and also to kind of anticipate and plan for whatever issues may come forward. So, I want to have good guests. Give them the chance to talk, learn something and have some humanity. Look at issues from a different perspective like I did in the courtroom, and have fun and educate ourselves both about what happened and what’s going to happen. 

MCDOWELL: Greg.

GUTFELD: I don’t want to educate anybody. Hey, I heard that you kind of — you have a lot in common with me and that you stick to a really strict routine that rarely changes. Like, you eat the same thing every day. I eat bacon at lunch and ribs at dinner every day. Are you that weird?

GOWDY: I’m a lot weirder than you are, Greg. I mean, if you want to send my life into a tailspin, then make me order off of a menu. I would eat the same thing for dinner, but my wife would not allow that. But yes, same thing for breakfast. And I don’t eat lunch at all. 

SMITH: Wow.

GUTFELD: What do you eat? What do you eat for breakfast and dinner?

GOWDY: I eat oatmeal and I would eat spaghetti every night for supper. But my wife is not going for that. So, I eat oatmeal every single morning and I just — I’m a creature of habit. I just — I like a routine and so if anybody wants to kill me I follow the same routine every single day for all you know, 30 or 40 million people that want to do that.

MCDOWELL: Sandra. 

SMITH: Trey, congratulations. Nobody here is surprise. You’re fantastic. 

We’ve always loved you. We love having you as a colleague. One thing I think you’re really good at, and I love watching you in the 7:00 hour in the week — on the weeknights that you’ve done a couple of weeks, you have a way of always finding the bright side of everything. Why are you optimistic about the future, Trey?

GOWDY: Well, Sandra, first of all, thank you for saying that. Someone I respect as much and watch as much is you. Thank you for that. I think, Sandra, I spent 20 years looking at the very worst that the human condition has to offer. I mean I was a homicide prosecutor. And you really just can’t go through life like that. 

I mean, there are so many good stories. There’s always another side to almost every issue, and sometimes there is a silver lining or a bright side. You just have to look at it. I have to make myself do it. I’m not — I’m not wired that way. Part of it, quite frankly, is the woman that I’ve lived with for the last 31 years who is so optimistic and hopeful, my best friend in politics, Tim Scott. Optimistic and hopeful, I had to force myself to do it because, you know, prosecutors are not known for their hopefulness or optimism.

MCDOWELL: Jesse.

WATTERS: You said you’re going to let your guests talk on the show. That’s a really bad idea and Gutfeld can also attest to that. 

GUTFELD: Yes.

WATTERS: You don’t really want to let your guests talk too much. But it’s a good time slot, 7:00. It’s right after the 4:00 football game on ends, and then right before Sunday Night Football. So, we’ll take the time to watch you at 7:00. What hairstyle are you going to debut on your first show? Is this going to check — because you’ve gone through many hair iterations? I think that’s really what the audience wants to know.

GOWDY: Well, Jesse, I will — first of all, you didn’t capture a one-one- hundredth of my hairstyles with that picture. I got a lot more than that. 

WATTERS: We couldn’t fit it on the screen. 

GOWDY: I’m going to do something — right, or in a one-hour time slot on the show. I’m going to do something weird. I’m going to model the hairstyle of my first guest every week and my first week — My FIRST guest Sunday night is Tim Scott.

WATTERS: Oh, you’re shaving it. All right, I like it. I’m tuning in for that.

MCDOWELL: I like — I like the kind of Rutger Hauer Blade Runner do that you had there, Trey. Harold?

FORD JR.: Trey Gowdy, I understand your first name is Harold. And I’m partial to that. I know a bunch of nerds named Harold. I can see why you wouldn’t want to go with that and go with Trey. But first of all, congrats. 

Not many people, I think, bring their critical thinking and the sense of humor and the ability to deliver a strong right hook politically when you have to better than you, so congrats. 

If you could give President Biden one piece of advice tonight as he’s trying to negotiate this infrastructure bill, what would it be to win a few Republicans over?

GOWDY: Probably Harold — first of all, I love that name. But a guy from Tennessee already has it, so I had to come up with something else. And I love being on “SPECIAL REPORT” with you. You’re such a gentleman. I would –

– I would actually encourage him to go back and read his inaugural address. 

He talked a lot about unity. And that means different things to different people, but it struck a chord with the nation. 

And if you’re going to talk about it, then do it. I would find a way where we don’t have to pass this through reconciliation, which is about the most dis-unifying thing I can think of.

MCDOWELL: Trey, good to see you. Thank you for being here. We’ll see you on Sunday night. 

GOWDY: Thank you. 

MCDOWELL: June 6, 7:00 p.m. 

GOWDY: Thank you. 

MCDOWELL: I’m glad that somebody is on the air who sounds like more of a hick than me. 

GUTFELD: Not really. 

MCDOWELL: Bless it. Thank you, Trey. 

GOWDY: Thank you. You all take care. 

MCDOWELL: Take care, sir. “ONE MORE THING” up next.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: Time now for one more thing. Let’s do this. OK, well, let’s not do this. Anyway, you know, you’ve heard of the Irish exit where you try to sneak out of a bar before anybody can see you. This dog has mastered that with (INAUDIBLE). If you noticed, he leaves the pool by getting out through the — through the water filter system. There you go. Isn’t that great?

Look at that. Then, he had some tremendous balancing act.

SMITH: Very cute.

GUTFELD: Isn’t that wonderful?

SMITH: So cute. 

GUTFELD: Excellent work. Jesse?

WATTERS: Well, I can’t plug my book every day. 

GUTFELD: Why not? 

WATTERS: Which is How I Save the World available on July 6. You can order it now on Amazon. So, I’m going to show you some other video that’s really funny. And it’s a celebrity jogger who eats apples while he juggles. Look at that talent. That guy was actually on America’s Got Talent. His name is Brian Pankey. 

Look at the showcase. Look at this concentration. That’s just brilliant athletic ability right there.

GUTFELD: At its very core.

GUTFELD: At its very finest — at its very core. You’re good. You’re good, Gutfeld. 

SMITH: That was quick. 

GUTFELD: All right, Dagen.

MCDOWELL: This one’s for you, Jesse. Jesse, I know you love to grill.

WATTERS: Yes.

MCDOWELL: Meats of all kinds. But don’t try to grill it off the exhaust of your Lambo Aventador because it might just explode if you’re revving the engine when it’s cold. Maybe some coolant leaked out. Boom, you just destroyed a car worth hundreds of thousands of dollars. Men like to grill, but they always screw it up. 

GUTFELD: Sandra.

SMITH: That was — OK, Cubs fan here born and raised. This is an impressive catch by a man who caught a foul ball while holding his beer in the other hand. And he manages to save the beer and catch the ball. That’s how we do it in Chi-Town. 

WATTERS: Bagged it. 

GUTFELD: 37-50 now? 

SMITH: Exactly. 

GUTFELD: They’re not going to drop it. 

SMITH: Old style, baby. 

GUTFELD: All right, Harold. 

FORD JR.: That was good. That was good, Sandra. This 3-year-old here is not just playing with makeup like other 3-year-olds. Here, little Dakota is painting herself as Sally from The Nightmare Before Christmas. And as you can see, she’s a pro. 

Here she’s painting herself I think as no way Penny Wise from the movie It. 

And you hear in the background, her dad, her father Jerome Patton who said he was shocked to see how good — there she is — how good and detailed she was with her makeup skills. 

GUTFELD: This is like when Jesse was doing his own makeup during COVID. 

FORD JR.: Dakota said she was first inspired, as you can see, to do this from watching Heath Ledger’s The Joker — The Joker character on The Dark Knight. Keep it going, Dakota. We’re proud of you. 

GUTFELD: All right.

WATTERS: All right, Dakota. 

GUTFELD: It’s so nice to have real makeup now. 

WATTERS: Yes.

GUTFELD: The stuff I was using — 

SMITH: You look great. 

GUTFELD: Thank you. Who said that? All right, that’s it for us. “SPECIAL REPORT” is up next. He looks great. His name is Bret.

Copy: Content and Programming Copyright 2021 Fox News Network, LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Copyright 2021 VIQ Media Transcription, Inc.  All materials herein are protected by United States copyright law and may not be reproduced, distributed, transmitted, displayed, published or broadcast without the prior written permission of VIQ Media Transcription, Inc. You may not alter or remove any trademark, copyright or other notice from copies of the content.